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Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Getting My Zen Back!

So today was one of those days where something different happened, but I'm not sure what it means yet.  My bb is now 10 weeks.  Today he grabbed a toy for the first time and has found his hands to suck.  Two milestones, but this evening instead of crying himself to sleep after his colic episode or conking out after last feeding around 8:30.  He was calm and alert after feeding.  Now what do I do?  I was so used to soothing him for hours then just putting him down at night.  Tonight I actually sat with him and read him Goodnight Moon.  Imagine that, but he was still awake.  Then I started the putting to sleep process.  Rocking, swaddling.  At first I left his arms out, but as he started to fall asleep he started flinching...so maybe he's not ready for that yet. so back they go.  He also had a 3 hour nap right before going to sleep so I'm not sure how that will affect his sleep patterns tonight.  His first sleep is usually the longest so I better get to bed.  Today was also the day I got my Zen back.  For the last few weeks I have been second guessing everything that I have been doing.  I'm exhausted from carrying my baby in a sling all day and rocking him and waking up  every hour after 2 am. The books have been driving me crazy.  If I use a pacifier will I be putting it back in all night long.  He will only nap in a sling-so does that mean I will be carrying him everyday for months?  All the things that soothe him, I was focusing on the effects down the road instead of just mothering.  I don't know I may have to fix a few habits later, but for now they are the only things that calm my high need baby. Hanging out with two fellow new moms for lunch watching thier babies cry and watching them soothe their babies with what know best made me realize you have to do what works for you. By 10 weeks you know your baby and what he needs and what his cries mean most of the time so time to follow my gut rather than a book.

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